Most young people take class at school for wide ranging subjects of a purely academic sort, but schools also provide more practical classes like home economics and shop. Sadly, few if anyone trains the young in how to handle themselves in an important social or business setting, despite such a gathering's potential for making all sorts of advancement. Luckily, the average college graduate and non-graduate alike can complete their education with books on small talk.
There is a distinct minority of people among us who simply seem to have a gift for making a dinner party shine with their conversation. Often enough, these turn out to be those raised in upper middle class or just plain upper class families, among whom effective light talk is a matter of training. Most will admit that one of the advantages inherent in an Ivy League background is not about academic excellence at all, but rather, in being trained to talk about nothing in an engaging way.
By comparison, those making the move into the professions from a working class background might be talented and have a great work ethic, but because of that background might lack skill in light conversation. A stock literary figure remains the newly-arrived industrialist who lacks in "breeding, " who is simply too rich not to be invited to the parties, but is broadly unpopular. This sort is usually marked by his coarse use of language.
In any number of situations, being able to make good conversation can be a tremendous advantage. Dating life is among the more obvious of these spheres of life, a sphere that is not just about conversing with a date over dinner but the right kind of flirting at a dinner party. By "dating life" one also includes random moments when one meets someone in a supermarket, at work, or on the street.
Business and commerce afford an endless number of scenarios which can be made use of by an ambitious, well spoken person. The poor person who gets his big break charming a rich man during an elevator ride is the stuff of movies, but it does happen. In some business situations, especially the sale and the interview, conversational skill can be enormously important.
Life is full of scenarios that seem breezy on the surface, but which quietly seethe with tension. For an up and coming poet, an established poet's reading can be a place where one makes all important contacts. But this must always be done with a casual air, without seeming like one is too obviously "on the make."
One's humor should be fresh, quick to the point, and slow to offend even the most sensitive. It is worth while to cultivate at least a passing interest in many subjects without showing oneself to be overwhelmed with passion about them. Above all, one should learn to find what is likable in the people one encounters.
It is rude not to talk to everybody, or at least a broad range of people. One must not fall into the habit saving one's newly found wit for those who will be useful. This way one gets not only invited to the right parties, but invited back.
There is a distinct minority of people among us who simply seem to have a gift for making a dinner party shine with their conversation. Often enough, these turn out to be those raised in upper middle class or just plain upper class families, among whom effective light talk is a matter of training. Most will admit that one of the advantages inherent in an Ivy League background is not about academic excellence at all, but rather, in being trained to talk about nothing in an engaging way.
By comparison, those making the move into the professions from a working class background might be talented and have a great work ethic, but because of that background might lack skill in light conversation. A stock literary figure remains the newly-arrived industrialist who lacks in "breeding, " who is simply too rich not to be invited to the parties, but is broadly unpopular. This sort is usually marked by his coarse use of language.
In any number of situations, being able to make good conversation can be a tremendous advantage. Dating life is among the more obvious of these spheres of life, a sphere that is not just about conversing with a date over dinner but the right kind of flirting at a dinner party. By "dating life" one also includes random moments when one meets someone in a supermarket, at work, or on the street.
Business and commerce afford an endless number of scenarios which can be made use of by an ambitious, well spoken person. The poor person who gets his big break charming a rich man during an elevator ride is the stuff of movies, but it does happen. In some business situations, especially the sale and the interview, conversational skill can be enormously important.
Life is full of scenarios that seem breezy on the surface, but which quietly seethe with tension. For an up and coming poet, an established poet's reading can be a place where one makes all important contacts. But this must always be done with a casual air, without seeming like one is too obviously "on the make."
One's humor should be fresh, quick to the point, and slow to offend even the most sensitive. It is worth while to cultivate at least a passing interest in many subjects without showing oneself to be overwhelmed with passion about them. Above all, one should learn to find what is likable in the people one encounters.
It is rude not to talk to everybody, or at least a broad range of people. One must not fall into the habit saving one's newly found wit for those who will be useful. This way one gets not only invited to the right parties, but invited back.
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